Orion Maxfield

Resources.

Things you can use tonight. Nothing on this page needs an email to read.

Tools

  • The first kind thing

    Three true things about yourself, out loud, then one more each day for a week. The exercise everything else here starts from.

    Free, in the browser
  • The seven-day sheet

    The same exercise on one printable page, with what to do on the day you skip. Sent by email.

    Free, by email

Using AI as a tool, not a therapist

I teach people to use AI for their own growth, so I'll say this carefully. AI can help you think. It can ask you questions at one in the morning when nobody else is awake, help you find words for something you've never said, and hold a plan steady while you're wobbling. Those are real gifts, and I use them.

What it can't do is know you. It won't notice what you're not saying, hold you accountable next Tuesday, or sit with you. It agrees too easily, and a man in shame does not need something that agrees with him. Use it to get ready for the conversation with a real person. Don't use it instead of one. And if tonight is a crisis, it's the wrong tool entirely; call 988 or a human.

Two prompts I'd actually hand you:

I'm going to describe how I talked to myself today. Don't reassure me and don't fix it. Ask me three questions that help me notice the pattern.

Help me write three small, true things I like about myself. If I'm being vague or grandiose, push back and make me get specific.

More on this, and a growing set of prompts, is coming to this page.

If you need help tonight

These aren't mine, and they're better than anything I could write for a night that's going badly.

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988, any time, anywhere in the US.
Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741.
findahelpline.com: numbers outside the US.

Finding a real person to work with

Psychology Today's therapist directory is the widest net. Open Path Collective is where I'd start if cost is the obstacle. If you're a member of the Church, the Addiction Recovery Program runs free, confidential group meetings for pornography and other struggles, and you don't need a referral to walk in.